Homosexuality: Two ways forward

Sometimes, timing is everything.

And so it was that last week, in the same week, two things happened. First, Sam Allberry wrote a blog:

Jesus is more than worth it, even with all it entails for gay people... Homosexuality is an issue I have battled with my entire Christian life. It took a long time to admit to myself, longer to admit to others, and even longer to see something of God’s good purposes through it all. There have been all sorts of ups and downs. But this battle is not devoid of blessings, as Paul discovered with his own unyielding thorn in the flesh. Struggling with sexuality has been an opportunity to experience more of God’s grace, rather than less.

Sam is associate minister at St Mary's Maidenhead, and a great writer (Lifted and Connected). I don’t know him personally, but he’s clearly a godly and brave man who knows and (crucially) loves the gospel. His experience is that the “gain” of knowing Jesus outweighs any “loss”—as he puts it, (quoting Mark 10 v 28-30): “however much we have to leave behind we are never left out of pocket … no-one who leaves will fail to receive”.

We need people like Sam, and Vaughan Roberts, who have bravely stood up and said, effectively: I have been tempted to find blessing in acting on my attraction to people of the same gender as me. But I have found more blessing in not acting on that, and in loving, obeying and serving Jesus instead. There is more blessing in denying self and embracing Jesus than there is in doing the opposite. The wider church needs to hear this; society needs to hear this; and probably evangelical churches need to hear it too so we guard our comments about those struggling with homosexual temptation carefully.

The second thing that happened was that the Anglican House of Bishops announced that men who are living in celibate civil partnerships with other men can become bishops.

I want to be careful here. The Bible does not say that it is sinful to live in the same house as another man, just as it does not say it is sinful for an unmarried couple to live in the same house.

But what it is is unwise. And it’s what happens when we approach an issue from the other direction to Sam. Sam’s passion, as his blog brings across wonderfully, is to serve the Lord Jesus and enjoy His blessings, by sacrificially obeying Him. He has, to put it slightly cheesily, given up his earthly cake in order to eat the heavenly one. But deciding that it is a good idea to live with a same-sex partner who you are attracted to, but not to go “the whole way”, is to hold on to as much earthly cake as you can in one hand, while attempting to grab the heavenly one with the other. It’s to try to love the world and God at the same time, which is impossible (James 4 v 4).

So let’s honour men like Sam, who have left things behind because they know the greatness of following Jesus, and who have had the courage to do so publicly. Let’s pray for those who like Sam are obeying Jesus and fighting temptation, but unlike him are doing so unsupported by Christian friends because they fear that the response will be misunderstanding or rejection. Let’s pray for those who have completely forgotten the blessing of whole-heartedly following Jesus, and are trying to love both the world and Him, but being encouraged by their denomination to love the world more than Him.

And let’s challenge ourselves, too. Are we open and honest about our temptations? Are we determined to resist in order to obey? Do we truly treasure Jesus enough to leave behind the glittering fake gold of worldly pleasures? Where are we moving in with an area of temptation, thinking I’ll enjoy it as much as I can, but stop just short of sinfulness? Where do we need to look at Jesus, loving him so much that we don’t cosy up to any areas of temptation, but instead push them away, leave them behind, and get on with enjoying the blessings of whole-hearted service of our Lord?