Why Does Growing Closer to God Seem So Boring?

Let’s be honest: the things people tell you are meant to help you grow closer to God—stuff like praying, reading the Bible, going to church—can feel pretty boring a lot of the time, right?

If Jesus wants to lead us into the best life possible, why does this stuff so often feel like such a struggle?

We’re out of practice

My friend Justin is a runner.

One of his favourite things to do on a Saturday is to get up way too early, go outside into the cold, and just run five kilometres. For fun. Which is hard for me to understand—because whenever I go for a run, it’s not fun at all. It’s just painful and sweaty and exhausting.

Same activity. Two completely different experiences. Why?

If Jesus wants to lead us into the best life possible, why does this stuff so often feel like such a struggle?

Well, partly it’s because Justin and I have very different personalities. But mostly it’s because Justin runs several times a week—and I run about once every seven years. Justin has made running a regular part of his life and as a result, running has become natural and normal and even fun for him in a way that it just isn’t for me.

Not only that, but he’s unlocked all kinds of benefits I’m missing out on: better fitness, better sleep, stronger bones, better ability to fight disease…

I wish I had all that. I wish I could run like Justin. And the truth is, there’s nothing stopping me. If I got up a few mornings a week and went for a run— if I just stuck with it—before long, I’d push through the sweaty, painful part to the part where it actually gets good.

The problem is, because I’m so out of practice, when my alarm goes off in the morning, it’s so much easier to just roll over in bed.

And the same thing is true for the habits that help us feel closer to God: if we’re out of practice, they can feel awkward and unnatural (and, honestly, kind of pointless) at first—which means it’s all too easy to quit before we get to the good stuff.

And unfortunately, getting started is only part of our struggle.

We fill our time with other things

My friend Chris Coffee is an incredible guitar player. Every time I see Chris play the guitar, it makes me want to learn to play. And the great news is, Chris has offered several times to teach me. I even went out and bought a really nice guitar a few years ago. So why is that guitar sitting under my bed, collecting dust?

Well, if you asked me why I haven’t learned to play the guitar yet, my answer would probably be, “I just haven’t had the time.”

Which feels true. But actually, I don’t think it is.

See, I made an embarrassing discovery recently. Turns out my Nintendo Switch has a feature that tracks how many hours I’ve spent playing each game I own—and let’s just say that even if I’d just spent some of those hours picking up a guitar instead of a controller, I’d probably be a pretty good musician by now.

But the truth is, we all make time for what we most value. And so the real question isn’t, “Are you busy?”—because we’re all filling our time with something. The real question is, “What are you busy with?”

Same deal with the hours I’ve spent scrolling on my phone, or watching TV, or caught up in other activities I’ve committed to. It’s not that any of those other things are bad, exactly.

But as much as I might like to tell myself I “don’t have time” to learn guitar, one look at the Screen Time app on my phone tells me that’s just not true.

I do have time. I’m just spending it on other things.

What are you busy with?

And this is the same struggle we face when it comes to investing in our friendships with God: even if we like the idea of making time to pray or read the Bible or whatever, it’s so easy to feel like we just can’t fit it into our schedule. 

But the truth is, we all make time for what we most value. And so the real question isn’t, “Are you busy?”—because we’re all filling our time with something.

The real question is, “What are you busy with?”

This extract has been adapted from How Can I Feel Closer to God?, the latest in our Big Questions series. In this fun and fast-paced book. Christian Studies teacher and school chaplain Chris Morphew shows children how to grow in their relationship with God through the ordinary yet powerful habits of everyday discipleship: prayer, Bible reading, church community, rest and simplicity