Evangelist John Chapman once remarked that the surest way to halt the conversation at a dinner party was to turn to your host and ask them: "Have you given any thought to your death recently?" People just don't want to talk about dying.
You Only Live Once! is a statement shortened to YOLO - a tag that Twitter user to justify anything at all. But a survey revealed last week that, while people are more than happy to talk about the upside of that statement, they are far more reticent to admit to the downside. After this one life, we die.
This is the theme of a campaign by the Dying Matters Coalition, set up by the National Council for Palliative Care (NCPC) in 2009. This year’s theme is ‘You Only Die Once‘ – Twitter users are being asked to tweet with the #YODO hashtag during the awareness week that has just finished.
The coalition conducted a survey of more than 2,000 British adults to coincide with the week-long initiative. The results revealed that more than eight out of ten Britons believe we are a nation that is uneasy about discussing death. Only a third of Britons have written a will, while a similar percentage have registered as an organ donor. Of those with a partner, half do not know the end of life wishes of their significant other.
‘Most of us aren’t comfortable talking about dying,’ said Joe Levenson, director of communications at the Dying Matters Coalition. ‘Talking about dying and death is one of the last taboos in Britain. I guess we’re not very comfortable facing up to our own mortality. We like to either pretend it’s never going to happen to us or just find other things that we’d rather talk about.’
And even when people do get round to talking about it, they often don't talk about it in any great depth or detail - preferring to imagine that it would be easy to end it all - like the "death pact" announced by TV presenters Richard and Judy last week.
The Bible reveals a deeper reason why we fear death. Not the great unknown. Not the prospect of pain and suffering as we approach a final illness. But the reality of a judgement to follow. We die once and then face judgement, says the writer to the Hebrews (9:27). And Paul tells us in Romans 1 that we have all suppressed the truth that there is a just God who we must face in eternity.
But the good news of the gospel is that there was a death that reversed the inevitable pattern of life followed by death. In Jesus we have life followed by death followed by life again. Because his death dealt with the fear of death, which is the wrath of God against our unrighteousness.
So why not talk some more about your own death - if they find the subject difficult. Encourage people to write a will (it is the official duty of Church of England ministers), talk about what you want at your funeral service and why. And talk about how your fear of death is no more - because the Lord Jesus has been through it for you.
Fionnola Morris